Friday, August 31, 2012


Before dinner last night I drank a huge glass of water and I had another again with my meal.  Needless to say, an hour or so later my bladder was feeling the strain.  I was at a friend's house at this point so I asked to use her toilet.  I went into the bathroom and saw this little contraption (minus the handles) sitting on the toilet.

You can file this under TMI (too much information) but when I pee...
  • I do not trickle.
  • it comes out fast and under high pressure.
  • I cannot stop.
So....I sat on the toilet and all of a sudden I heard splashing on the tile floor.  I looked down to see the stream shooting across the the channel, over the edge and onto the floor and there was nothing I could do to stop the flood.  I tried moving farther back on the seat but that just made matters worse as my new position caused the stream to arc higher to the point that it almost reached the wall in front of me. I shifted again and the stream now escaped over the edges of the channel and onto the rest of the seat. I could only watch helplessly as my own personal Niagara Falls formed a lake on the bathroom floor.  
I asked for a rag, mopped up the floor (it took a while), and left to run some other errands in town  red faced and with slightly damp undies.  I know... TMI

1 comment:

  1. 1. This blog is so aptly named. 2. TMI?! I've got TMI! My mother-in-law's wooden toilet seat (which she purchased separately and added) sits about an inch above the toilet bowl. Many a stream has been known to find that gap. And not only mine, a toilet training Esky too. I remember the first time it happened I was thinking, "I'm sure my leg is getting wet. No, it'll be a phantom feeling, it can't be." It was. Well, that was the first time I *knew* it happened, anyway. Eep. Anyway, she still has this toilet seat. I spend time there. Often. It's a contortionist act every. time.