Friday, May 21, 2010


So much for the mouse problem, I now have a family of turkeys frequenting  my lawn each day.  I thought it was pretty funny when they first showed up.  So did the painter and the plumber.  We discovered that the slamming of the front door would send them into a gobbling frenzy.  I caught the painter going out one afternoon and when he got no response from the slamming door he purposely opened the door and slammed it shut extra hard just set them off.  I reminded him he was sixty not six.

The other day I caught one of them sunning itself on my deck.  

Again funny but the mess it left behind did not impress me, neither did the mess that came inside from the bottom of someone's shoe.  

I chased them off but they came back.  I threatened them with a big stick and still they came back.   I resorted to explaining to them that if I caught them pooping on my deck again, I didn't care who they belonged to, they would end up in my freezer.  So far so good.  I haven't seen them since which leaves me to wonder...
a) Can turkeys understand humanspeak?
b) Have my neighbours bugged my house, overheard me and kept them safe in their coop?
c) Did someone beat me to following through with the threat?

I also find it strangely coincidental that a single friend of mine posted as her facebook status that she was roasting a turkey. Very suspicious indeed.


  1. Hahaha Mark says he'll come and help you out with this--he's into hunting now! ;)

  2. One Armed BanditoMay 21, 2010 at 9:23 PM

    Are you sure that they're domestic?? they look like wild turkeys. I have a brother-inlaw who would PAY you SERIOUS CASH to come set up a blind in your yard...or he could just shoot em [with a bow and arrow of course], from your kitchen window..seriously $$$ call me :>

  3. Shop Girl: I am sure Mark would have no problem catching one even if he is a beginning hunter. They are pretty stupid.
    One Armed Bandito or should I say Bandita: I have reason to believe that you are the single friend that was cooking a whole turkey for yourself and are probably the reason I have not seen a single feather since I told you about them.