DIVERGENT

I'm almost embarrassed to make an appearance here after not writing for months.  There has been plenty to write about but recently a part of me thought it a little vain to be writing about my personal life and putting out there for all to see.  Does that make any sense? I guess I have been listening to some complaints from friends about bloggers they follow who write long and involved posts about every detail of their lives. It made me wonder if they thought that about me and they were giving me a gentle hint.
Anyway, tonight was the first time in a long time that I thought to myself "I have to blog about this."

Earlier this week while watching TV an ad came on for the movie Divergent.  Having read the book (the first of a trilogy) I mentioned to Emily and Nathan that I would like to see it.  Ian even expressed that it looked interesting. Knowing Ian's distaste for sci-fi, fantasy, or dystopian movies I told him that it wasn't his kind of movie and then went on to explain the premise of the film and he quickly agreed that he wouldn't like it.  Fast forward to tonight.

Driving past the theatre.

Ian: "We should go see a movie tonight."

Me: "That would be nice."

Ian: " Oh look Divergent is playing. We saw an ad for it remember?  It looked good."

At this point I thought he was joking and was going to say something sarcastic but then it dawned on me that he had completely forgotten the conversation we had after the ad. Now I was in a bit of a conundrum. This is more or less what went on inside my head.
" Should I remind him that he won't like it and we can go see something else or should I keep my mouth shut and go and see the movie I really want to see?  He might end up liking it... he said himself it looked good...  he really doesn't like that kind of movie....  but this one he might like... yeah, he's not going to like it... but it's Divergent and it's at the nice theatre with the comfy seats."

We saw Divergent tonight. Depending on who you talk to, it may or not be good.

PINTESTED

You should know by now of my love affair with Pinterest.  All my friends who do not use Pinterest think I am a creative genius the others are totally unimpressed. "Ya" they'll say "I saw that already on Pinterest."

One of the cute little craft projects I saw one day was this little frame.

I decided to make one and hang it on the wall at the end of the hallway to our  bathroom.  I wasn't sure what Ian would think of it and if he would ever even bother to write on it but he has surprised me and seems to quite enjoy the little love notes I leave for him.  He even reciprocates and leaves me little messages that warm my heart.  Sometimes the notes can even get a little... um...playful for want of a better word and I have to think twice before I tell someone that they can just go into my room to grab something from my bathroom.  Don't worry I am not going to share those ones with you but here are a couple of innocuous ones.

This one was in reference to those hideous peacock pants I wore once( and never again).

 This is one from just recently when I redid our bathroom.

Yes, I know my husband's handwriting is neater than mine and no it didn't actually take three weeks for him to notice.  He had been away for that long but it still made for a funny comment that was technically true.

GAS WOES

I have my husband figured out and the truth of the matter is he knows me pretty well too.  If he's going out the door and I say "oh by the way..."  he finishes off my sentence with "the car needs gas."  He is undoubtedly correct.  He thinks it's because I have an aversion to pumping gas and in a way he would be right but mostly it's because I never look at the fuel gauge.  He finds this hard to believe but it's true.
"How much gas is in the car?" he'll sometimes ask me when I get home from town and I'll reply "I don't know."  He cannot fathom this much in the same way that I cannot comprehend the fact that he does not know which drawer the can opener belongs in.  It doesn't cause problems, we just deal with it.  He is a sweetheart and for the most part keeps the car filled up for me.  Contrary to his opinion I do fill the car up from time to time although admittedly I do not enjoy it especially in the winter.  Whatever happened to full service gas stations?
Today I drove into town knowing that the truck was just about on empty (thanks Nathan) so I had to stop and fill up.  So there I stood in the cold and damp while my very thirsty truck guzzled down $150 in fuel, reading all the warnings posted on the pump about cell phone use, sparks, open flame, etc. to help pass the time. Finally the pump stopped but as I withdrew the nozzle from the tank it stopped short and wouldn't come out.  I tried and I tried and it wouldn't budge.  I had Emily get out of the truck and she had a go.  After no success we went into the store and the lady behind the counter came out and attempted to remove it with no luck.  She ended up calling a technician who arrived a short while later and after a few minutes he was able to pull it free.  I was nervous the whole time he was yanking on it after all I had just finished reading the warnings about the extreme caution to be used around the pumps.  What if it caused a spark and we all ended up being on the evening news because of the ensuing explosion?

Ian is already giving me a hard time about it, joking about how he'll have to teach me how to fill the car with gas, yada, yada, yada.  I'm okay with that because the next time we need gas I am just going to smile at him innocently and tell him that maybe it's not a good idea for me to fill it up considering the trauma of my last experience.  I'm clearly not capable.

THIS GIRL'S GOT TALENT

I attended another talent show the other night, this time in a different town.  I have to say I was a little disappointed.  Don't get me wrong, the talents showcased were great but there were no awkward moments or inappropriate songs to make the evening memorable although there was a comedy sketch that I didn't quite get.  Maybe I was too young for it because there was an eighty year old man who was laughing his head off.  It didn't help that I was preoccupied with a couple of little cuties so I'll withhold judgement on that one.

I hadn't planned on attending the event so wasn't prepared to participate in the talent portion of the evening but then remembered that I had brought my computer with me. Seeing that the projection screen was already up and that someone had an attachment that would hook up my computer to the projector gave me an idea to showcase my talent.   Without Ian's knowledge or permission, I played his skydiving video.  What's so talented about that?  Nothing really but that wasn't my talent.  Getting into trouble is my talent and in trouble I was.  Was it worth it you ask?  Why yes, yes it was!

CHANGES

Besides being a technotard my husband is also a bit of a chicken.  He is afraid of heights and prefers to keep his feet planted firmly on the ground that is why I was shocked when he agreed to go skydiving while we were in New Zealand last month.   There was no bribing nor begging nor taunting on my part to  coerce him into participating in such a high risk adventure.   I thought that perhaps he might chicken out at the last minute but he went through with it.  He's a changed man.  Hopefully he'll keep changing, maybe into something like this...

or this....

or maybe even this....

yeah, maybe in my dreams.

So do you want to see proof of the jump?  Check this out!

MIRROR, MIRROR IN THE HALL

I am taking a few minutes out of a very busy schedule to write a quick post from the lobby of Penha Longa in Portugal. (hey somebody's got to live this kind of life so why not me?)  I am having an amazing time learning more about Indian culture. and participating in an Indian wedding.

Traveling with Ian almost always provides some entertainment, like here and here.  This trip has been no exception.

Before we arrived at Penha Longa, we stayed at a beautiful hotel on the ocean.   For those of you who don't know, fancy shmancy hotels offer twice a day maid service.  In the evening they come in and turn down the bed, fill the ice bucket, and leave a chocolate on your pillow.  One night while Ian was showering I heard the doorbell ring. I opened the door wide and there stood the maid asking if we needed more towels or anything.  I told her we were fine so she reached for the chocolates to hand to me and I saw her do a double take and then smile.  I took the chocolates from her and turned back toward our room and it was then that I realized the reason for her smirk.  Ian had left a door open to the bathroom (they were french doors, with full length mirrors both sides).  I knew that the door was open but didn't think anyone could see into the bathroom from the door.  It would appear I was wrong.

I'm still laughing.

3 in 3

Ian strikes again.

• He struggled for a full 30 seconds trying to put his credit card into a parking meter so that the arm would go up and we could get into the parking garage.  All he had to do was press the button and take a ticket.
• When offered a treat, he declined saying that he had just finished brushing all of his teeth.  Really?  All of them?  wow!
• This morning at breakfast he complained that his contacts were bothering him and that he couldn't see properly.  He pulled one out and then told us he thought maybe he had just put one in and perhaps that was the problem.  We broke into fits off laughter.  He actually did have both in and was able to get the last one out.

We've only been on vacation three days. 

TWO SHOP OR NOT TWO SHOP?

There was a time when I loved to go grocery shopping( I know, I'm weird), it was my night out when the kids were little and I got to spend money... guilt free!  That all changed when the kids were teenagers and it became a never ending chore.  There was the odd occasion when I could convince Ian to take on this odious task and it was always met with varying degrees of success.  The lists I would send with him may as well have been written in encrypted code and my pleas to stick strictly to the list fell on deaf ears.  He has gotten better over the years and no longer brings home twenty cans of something we will never eat just because said item was on clearance. "Can you believe how cheap this is?" he would ask.  I hated to crush the enthusiasm and pride in his deal finding skills so I would bite my tongue and shake my head in disbelief  that the grocery store would be so generous as to sell high quality no name spam for just fifty cents a can.  I have not however been able to curb his propensity for purchasing  expensive items such as cherries out of season and tins of Belgian chocolate biscuits.  I have to admit I enjoy sending him out for a few items at Christmas time just so I can see what unexpected goodies he will bring home. He never disappoints.

Today we went grocery shopping together.  I learned a couple of things.
1. I need to drive the cart, is that the right term?  I know cart etiquette(and there is a certain etiquette) and the route through the store.  Ian does not.
2. Ian rearranging the items in the cart as I put them in drives me crazy, I didn't tell him though because I'm a fairly  decent wife.  It is a wonder though that in the more than thirty years that I have done all the grocery shopping, I have managed to make it home without crushed bread or broken eggs...nay, it is a near miracle. How did I (and the food) survive all these years without him?

CAN YOU SPOT THE DIFFERENCE?

I am sure you have played a Spot The Difference game at some time or another in your lifetime.  I like to play my own version of it here at home.  I change something in the house and wait to see how long it takes Ian to notice it.  So when he was gone a couple of weeks ago I took this...

and painted it to look like this....

Notice that I even changed out the hardware.  

This little table and matching mirror (not shown) sit right next to a closet that Ian uses every single day.   It has been an entire week.  He still hasn't noticed.   

THE DOORS (NOT THE ROCK BAND)

Now that we've been married for 30 years there's not much left to argue over we rarely ever argue.  We will however have a debate every now and again over things that are extremely important  generally benign.  Like the numbering of our garage door remotes.  We have a four car garage and unlike most Canadians, we do keep cars in our garage.  Why does the typical Canadian family cram their garage full of junk and park their car on the driveway to be covered in snow? but I digress....

So back to our remotes...there are four of them and each one differs slightly from the others.  Ian knows which one is his so there is never a problem until he wants to use my car.  I thought I had solved the problem when I took my handy dandy label maker and labelled all the remotes one through four.

Ian: "Which remote is for which door?"

Me: "I didn't think it could be any clearer, remote number one for door number one."

Ian: "Which is door number one?'

Thus began our debate.

I correctly know think that the doors should be numbered left to right (just like reading) as you come up the driveway.

Ian ridiculously believes that the doors should be numbered in ascending order starting with the door closest to the house.

Obviously surely you'll agree with me.  I guess it doesn't really matter either way because 1. The remotes are already marked and I am not worried about Ian changing them because he doesn't know how to use the label maker and 2. If more of you agree with Ian, I will not be divulging that information with him.  I will however be sure to tell him time and again that more agree with me.

IT MEANS WHAT?

As Brittany read my post from yesterday she laughed out loud which kind of confused me because there wasn't really anything that funny in it.

"Mom!" she said "you should not have put 'eat out' on there."

"What?...why not?"

"Don't you know what it means?"

Now I thought I was pretty knowledgeable in these things, after all I know what MILF means and the alternate meaning to 'tossing a salad' (trust me, you do not want to know) but 'eating out' was new to me.  So to clear up any confusion, when I used the term 'eating out' I was referring to the fact that Ian was indeed going out to a restaurant to have dinner.

MORNING HAS BROKEN

Matthew, Kere, and the kids stayed over last night.  I love it when they do except for the whole kids getting up at the crack of dawn thing.   William's bedroom is just above ours so I can usually hear his little feet running across the hardwood floor first thing in the morning.  He only weighs about thirty five pounds but it sounds as though there is a whole herd of elephants trampling around up there.  Well maybe it's not that bad but at 6:15 in the morning it sounds pretty similar.

This morning I did not hear a peep.  Ian the sweetheart that he is (and morning person too I might add), took William downstairs and fed him breakfast in the family room (a rare treat).   I made my way downstairs at about 8:30 to find them watching a movie together.
"It took me half an hour to figure out how to put this flipping movie on."  Ian complained.   Kere and I broke out into fits of laughter.   He was still complaining about it hours later as if it were my fault that he found it so difficult to put in a movie.

Oh how I love my technotard.

THE HANDYMAN CAN

I am the handyman in the house.  There is a reason for this.  We discovered early in our marriage that I was just more adept at that kind of thing.  If something came unassembled and with more than a page of instructions it was given to me to put together.

                                                                    

Of late, Ian has taken more of an interest in these things therefore I felt pretty comfortable in letting him handle the yearly changing of our water filter.  The filter is located in a dark corner of the crawl 

space in our basement right next to the water pump (we are on well water).  I carefully went through the instructions including clearly informing him that he would need to shut the water off to the filter.  He disappeared for a while and came back quite proud of himself.  He had successfully changed the filter.  I was proud of him too.

 Last week, he informed me that it was time to change the filter (the OCD in him makes him mark it on the calendar).  I was going to remind him that he had done it quite successfully the last time and maybe we should flip for it but decided it would be easier to just go and do the job.  I made my way to the filter and it was then that I discovered that a whole year before, Ian had forgotten to turn the water to the filter back on.  Yes, there is a reason I am the handyman.

THE EARLY BIRD...

Last week we went to Florida with some friends.  The week didn't start off the greatest when I suffered the worst migraine I have ever had.  As soon as we got to the resort after arriving, I laid on the bed, clothes and all and slept until the next morning, well almost morning.  I awoke at five thirty to the sound of Ian's voice asking me if I was awake.  Apparently because he was awake he felt I should be too, after all I had gone to bed hours earlier than he had.  I think I just mumbled "mmmm mmmm" and rolled over to try and sleep a little longer.  He informed me that he couldn't sleep so he was going to the front desk (in another building) to pick up an ethernet cable for the internet.   He got the cable and came back only to find that his electronic key would not open the door.  Not wanting to walk all the way back to get it reactivated, Ian decided he would just knock on the door and wake one of us up.  He knocked and he knocked and he knocked and he knocked until someone finally opened the door.  Apparently because Ian was awake he felt everybody in room 602 of building E should be too.  We were in building F.