SUNDAY SMILE

I have been doing a bit of online shopping this past week in preparation for Christmas.  These are some of the products I have passed on for various reasons.

1. My butt doesn't need a lawyer but when it does...

 2. I don't think I could ever be thirsty enough.

 3. I don't eat with this orifice.

 4. I find washing my clothes with barf doesn't get them as clean as I would like and I really don't care for the scent.

 5. I am not eating sugar right now but apparently the Aussies love this stuff.

6.  I hear these are very addictive.

 7.I think this goes with the crack sticks.

 8. I'm not even going to comment on this one.

CHRISTMAS SHOPPING IN STYLE

I know a lot of my friends are big fans of Christmas and rightly so but I have to say it annoys me when halloween is not even over and Christmas ornaments are lining the shelves at department stores and Christmas ads are already playing on television.  Don't get me wrong, I am a big fan of Christmas too but the season starts so early in the stores that by the time Christmas rolls around I'm pretty much tired of it all.   I do recognize the need to prepare early especially if you will be doing online shopping so as to allow for shipping.  There's nothing worse than receiving a gift you had planned to give , two days after Christmas.  There are some definite perks to shopping on line:

• no trying to find a parking space in a crowded lot.
• no bundling up to brave the cold/snow/ice. (northern hemisphere)
• no standing in line at checkouts.  
• no getting dressed. Shop in your pajamas if you want.  (I have seen people shopping in their pajamas at Walmart so this might not be a perk for some of you.)
• no store hopping looking for the right colour/size.
• no store hopping to compare prices.
• you can have items shipped directly to gift recipient.  This is great if you have family overseas.
• you get to open packages that come in the mail! So fun!

There are some cons to shopping online too:

• shipping costs.  These can be a real bummer if you are purchasing heavy items or from a company outside of the country you reside in.
• waiting to receive your items.  If you are "I want it now" kind of person, you are out of luck.
• returning items.  This can be a real pain and costly.
• not seeing the item in person.  That dress looked really cute on line but in the light of day the colour is ghastly/fabric is not what you expected/ size is way off.

I do shop a fair bit online and for the most part it has been successful.  Quite a few of my friends are really nervous about it and refuse to even try.  Here are a few tips that I have learned along the way.

• Always pay for things through a secure server.  You can tell it is secure by looking at the url.  If it begins with http it is not secure.  If it begins https then your payment information will be encrypted and secure.  Please note that the shopping pages themselves may not be secure and that's fine, it is only when you are sending payment information that you want it secure. There is often a little lock icon too in the url.  If it is closed then it is secure, if it is unlocked it's not secure.  
• Open a paypal account.  Many sellers online accept paypal and it saves you a lot of time.  Paypal is a secure site that stores your credit card information and address. It is just a matter of entering your paypal password instead of all you credit card information and shipping address to purchase items. Paypal also will reimburse money for items purchased through ebay.com that have not arrived.  Paypal also sends you an email receipt so you have further proof of your purchase.
• ebay.com/.ca/.nz is a great place to buy just about anything new and used.  Pay particular attention to the item description (do not rely solely on photos) and the seller's information. Check the seller's feedback.  If it's not close to %100 don't bother buying from them. Be sure to check shipping costs and delivery times.
• Always keep a copy of the receipt.  All online stores email you a receipt.  I keep mine in a special folder and move them to another when the item arrives, that way I can keep track of things that are late and can send an enquiry if needed.

Some of my favourite sites to shop?

• ebay.ca  Like I said before, you can buy almost anything there, again just watch for shipping costs and read description carefully.
• etsy.com  This is a site for mostly handmade articles.  It can be pricey depending on the seller but the stuff is just adorable  and it can't be found in stores.
• amazon.ca  It's not just books, there are lots of items here and usually at decent prices.  
• bookdepository.co.uk  This site is fairly new to me but already I am loving it.  This company ships books worldwide for FREE!  There isn't a minimum amount to purchase to qualify.  Love it!  I received my books within a week of ordering.  I am impressed.

So pull out your laptop, put your feet up, relax, and go shopping in style!

RIGHT ON TARGET

The greatest news to hit our area recently was the announcement that our local Zellers was being converted to a Target store.  For those of you who have shopped across the border at Target, you'll know what exciting news this is.  We had heard rumours before but now there is actual evidence with big "Closing Out" sales signs splashed across the front of the store windows.  I can't resist a good sale so in I went.  I purchased a few items that were more than 50% off (score!).  There were a couple of items I left on the shelf though.

I personally have nothing against leopard print gardening tools...

and I may have purchased them if my gardener looked like this.  Who knew gardening tools could be sexy?

If only this went with my decor.  Notice that it is in my cart.  I found it in there after I had wandered away for a moment to use the price check scanner.  Thanks Olivia!  Really though, who would buy this? Enquiring minds want to know!

FASHIONISTA

While in town grocery shopping today my lovely daughter-in-law suggested we stop by Winners to check out their amazing end of summer, clearance sale.  Being of Scottish descent I could not pass up the opportunity to save some money so off we went.   As we rifled through the clearance racks, I came across the ghastliest pair of pants I had ever seen.  It didn't surprise me that they were on sale for the very reduced price of three dollars.  I showed them to Emily and we had a good laugh.  I put them back on the rack and walked away but then the thought came to me that for three dollars I could have some fun so I put them in the cart and purchased them.

When I got home from shopping I slipped out of the jeans I was wearing and donned my new ghastly pants so that Ian would think that I had worn them in town. (This was done in the driveway before I entered the house... and I wonder why embarrassing things happen to me.)

Emily and I both were doubled over in laughter as we went into the house.  It was hard to wipe the smiles off our faces as Ian entered the room, in fact Emily hid her face behind the fridge door as she put groceries away. I waited for his reaction.

"What are you smiling about" he asked.

"Nothing" I replied.

"You were waiting for me to say something about the pants right?" (he thought I was testing to see if he would even notice them)

"Don't  you like them?"

"Actually I do."

His reaction surprised me and totally disappointed me.  It was so not what I was expecting.

"You like them?!!!!"

"Yes, why?  What's wrong with them?"

"I look like a peacock!"


This is why Ian is not allowed to buy me clothes.

I wore the pants for the rest of the night waiting to hear the reaction from both Matthew and Nathan.  Matthew didn't say a thing although he told me later he now knew where his brothers got their sense of style and Nathan said something about the '70s wanting their pants back.

I still can't believe that my husband would be okay with me going out in public with these on.

SEW FAR,SEW GOOD.

Have you wondered why I have not been blogging much lately?  Well you can blame it all on pinterest.  

This is basically what I have been doing in my spare time, well this and spending time with my sweet little grandchildren.  The idea was to set up an account on etsy.com   and sell some of them (the chevron quilt and the personalized one are taken) but I am having difficulty even thinking about parting with them.  I picked out the fabric, put my blood (at least one pinprick per quilt), sweat (do you know how hot it's been lately) and tears (not really the tears but certainly some frustration) into each quilt and in the end I like them so much that I don't want to let them go but then I really have no need for them. I think I may have a problem.  I am going to have to sell them just so I can keep up my fabric habit (and I do have a habit).  Emily and I have made a pact not to go fabric shopping  until August.  So far, so good but then again, it's only been a week.

I STAND CORRECTED

Remember when I bragged about my detective skills?  It seems my observational prowess is not nearly as great as I thought it was.  Yesterday I left my bank card in the debit machine at the grocery store.  In my defense I was distracted by the conveyor belt at the checkout I used.  It wouldn't stop moving and the cashier and I were struggling with it as I tried to remove boxes of jars off the conveyor belt and into my cart.  Fortunately it was at the very next store that I realized the bank card was missing from my wallet and I made a return trip through town to retrieve it.   I approached the cashier at the first till and asked where I should go to inquire about my card.

"Right here" she replied as she opened a drawer and pulled out a stack of bank cards.  "Can you tell me the last three numbers of your card?" she asked.

"ummmm.....no?" I ventured "but it's got my name on it."  I proceeded to tell her my name. She proceeded to tell me that there were no names on either of the two cards from my bank.  My heart skipped a beat.  Perhaps my card had dropped in the parking lot and was gone for good.
"Could you check the back of it please?  I know that my signature is on the back."
She checked.  No signature on either card.
"I was just here less than half an hour ago, and I left it at that checkout there." I explained as I pointed out the lane I had used.
"This would be the one then. "  She said as she handed me a card. "Maybe you could try and purchase something with it."

I did.  It worked.  Don't judge.

When you shop at a store that displays signs like this though,  it's hard to feel overly stupid.

SO THONG 2011

I took Kere's younger sister Kiri shopping at the mall today which meant going into stores I usually wouldn't venture into.  One in particular, caters to young women and I stood patiently while Kiri checked out the underwear table. We had a good laugh about some of the styles and after deciding she didn't want any we walked away.  As I turned from the table, the entire display of lace thongs fell to the floor at my feet.  I picked them up and quickly threw them back on the table and hurried out of the store.  We continued down the halls of the mall wandering in and out of stores for about an hour when I glanced down and realized that my shoelaces were untied.  I bent down to tie them up and realized it wasn't a loose lace that I had spied  flapping around but a lace thong stuck onto the velcro closure of my coat.

A HAPPY NEW YEAR  TO EVERYONE!

TWO SHOP OR NOT TWO SHOP?

There was a time when I loved to go grocery shopping( I know, I'm weird), it was my night out when the kids were little and I got to spend money... guilt free!  That all changed when the kids were teenagers and it became a never ending chore.  There was the odd occasion when I could convince Ian to take on this odious task and it was always met with varying degrees of success.  The lists I would send with him may as well have been written in encrypted code and my pleas to stick strictly to the list fell on deaf ears.  He has gotten better over the years and no longer brings home twenty cans of something we will never eat just because said item was on clearance. "Can you believe how cheap this is?" he would ask.  I hated to crush the enthusiasm and pride in his deal finding skills so I would bite my tongue and shake my head in disbelief  that the grocery store would be so generous as to sell high quality no name spam for just fifty cents a can.  I have not however been able to curb his propensity for purchasing  expensive items such as cherries out of season and tins of Belgian chocolate biscuits.  I have to admit I enjoy sending him out for a few items at Christmas time just so I can see what unexpected goodies he will bring home. He never disappoints.

Today we went grocery shopping together.  I learned a couple of things.
1. I need to drive the cart, is that the right term?  I know cart etiquette(and there is a certain etiquette) and the route through the store.  Ian does not.
2. Ian rearranging the items in the cart as I put them in drives me crazy, I didn't tell him though because I'm a fairly  decent wife.  It is a wonder though that in the more than thirty years that I have done all the grocery shopping, I have managed to make it home without crushed bread or broken eggs...nay, it is a near miracle. How did I (and the food) survive all these years without him?

WHO DOES THAT?

This morning Brittany and I went in to town to run a few errands which basically means we went to Wal-mart ( a shocker I know to think that I would ever shop at Wal-mart).  As we waited in line for the shopper ahead of us to finish paying for her purchases, I pulled out my debit card in preparation to pay for the few items I had on the conveyer belt.  On the drive in to town, Brittany had given me a 20 dollar bill to pay me for some diapers I had picked up for her the day before and instead of putting it in my wallet, I just threw it into my purse.  There is a reason I am telling you all this because you see, as I pulled my wallet out of my purse, that 20 dollar bill fell out on to the floor where the lady ahead of me picked it up and instead of handing it to me she put it in her pocket!  At first I thought she was joking with me and gave a half laugh until I realized she was serious. To say I was shocked is an understatement. 

Me: "Excuse me, that's my twenty dollars you just picked up."

Her: "No it isn't."

Me: "Yes it is, it just fell out of my purse."

Brittany: "That's my mom's money."

I looked at the cashier for help but she just shrugged her shoulders and apologized that she hadn't seen any of it transpire.

Me:"I'd like my money back please!"

Her: "It's not yours, it's mine."

Me: "Are you serious? I can promise you that it's mine."

Her: "Does it have your name on it?"

Me: "What?...NO!, I don't go around writing my name on my money."

Her: "Then how can you prove it is yours?"

With that she turned and walked away. I stood there shocked (and ticked, I might add). Seriously who does that?  Brittany urged me to have security called but the woman was almost out the door already and really, how could I prove it was mine.  It was at this point that I realized that the woman had left behind one of her shopping bags, you know the kind that is reusable and is certainly distinguishable from the grey plastic bags that Wal-mart uses? Just as I finished paying for my stuff and with Brittany badgering me to do something about the situation, I saw the woman marching back toward the counter. Aha, she had realized that in her haste to get away she'd left her bag behind! Too bad for her.  I picked up her shopping bag and slung it over my shoulder.

Her: "That's my shopping bag you have there!"

Me: " Um...Does it have your name on it? 

Her: "NO!"

Me: "I didn't think so."

I left the store with a huge smile on my face.  I couldn't have cared less if her shopping bag contained 2 dollars worth of stuff or 200 dollars.  We hightailed it to the car and took off before anyone could call us back laughing the whole way and yes, I did keep the bag.

Now I know you are wondering what was in the bag but I haven't taken any pictures of the loot yet so it will have to wait until tomorrow.  For those of you whom I have talked to today and related this story, don't spoil it for the rest.  It really requires a picture to do it justice.

SHOPPING EXCURSION

You may think that spending five hours in one store would be excruciatingly painful but not when that one store is Ikea and your shopping partners are your daughter and pregnant daughter-in-law. 
Highlights of our trip?

Our .99c breakfast: Two sausages, scrambled eggs, and home fries. mmmm... it sustained us for the whole five hours.

The deals: A set of food containers for $5, floor lamps for $10, a bookcase for $30. Kere was in her absolute bargain hunting glory.

The fun: Kere awoke that morning with a back ache so there were frequent stops in the store while she rested her back by reclining on the wonderful sofas on display. At one point, I instructed her to lie down and bring her knees to her chest in order to stretch out the lower back muscles. After a couple of minutes I told her to spread her knees apart and started to yell "PUSH".  We broke into fits of laughter at the startled looks on the other customers faces.

It was a great day and the only thing that could have made it better was if my other daughter-in-law could have been there.  We missed you Olivia.

They heard we were coming.