YOU CAN TAKE A GIRL OUT OF THE COUNTRY...

On Monday night Ian and I attended the Mormon Tabernacle Choir concert held in Toronto.  We were asked some time before if we would be willing to be host to a couple of dignitaries attending.  This entailed entertaining them at the reception held before the concert, making sure they received a complimentary cd, helping them to their seats, and just making sure they enjoyed the evening.  Ian and I were to be hosts to Vivienne Poy and Jean Augustine along with their guests.  Both women were absolutely delightful to spend time with and we thoroughly enjoyed the few hours we accompanied them.  The concert was amazing and after one particularly rousing number I rose to my feet, cupped my hands to my mouth and shouted "woo hoo!". I was not the only one in the audience to do so but I was the only one in our company.  Oops.   Not thinking, I did it at the end of the concert as well, proof that you can take the girl out of the country but you can't take the country out of the girl.  I wonder if we will  be asked to host again.

AKA (almost known as) SHAGGY DOG

Proof that Nathan was a dream child.  He let me dress him in this without complaint.

We thought we'd let our 4 kids have a hand in naming the latest addition to our family.  They decided if the baby was a boy he should be called Shaggy Dog.  We nixed that idea but the boys got their revenge and called him Nate Dog as a teenager. 

He was a dream child from day one.

• one hour total labour. That's right, one hour only.  Every mom should be that lucky.
• slept through the night at six weeks. Pure heaven when you have four other kids to deal with all day.
• rarely cried. Not even when his brothers inflicted pain that would have made even their eyes water.
• was always singing or whistling.  I was a bit worried when all he would sing was Backstreet Boys songs but he outgrew it. Phew!
• kind hearted.  He once offered his sister his ice cream cone when hers fell on the ground without any hesitation.
• happy disposition.  Not much gets that boy down.
• made friends easily. When he enrolled in a new school he told me he wouldn't talk to anyone for three days, he had a new best friend by lunch time.

That little dream child could also be a bit of a nightmare just so you don't think he was totally perfect.

 

He

• ate poop out of the toilet thanks to an older brother who didn't bother to flush or put the lid down. 
• stole cheese from the fridge all the time.  I was forever finding little bite marks on the cheese block.
• flushed toys and toothbrushes down the toilet. I can now remove a toilet seat and reassemble it in no time now, a skill that has proven handy.
• had a party at the house once when we were out. The only one of our kids to ever do this and get caught.  Don't think I am fooled you guys, I know there were other parties... Brittany....

I can't believe my baby is twenty three today.  Where did the time go?  That sweet, sweet boy is now a man I'm still wrapping my head around that one all married and grown up.  It won't be too long until he's a parent himself this is not an announcement although I wish it was.  When the time does come, he will be a great dad.  His nieces and nephews adore him and it's no wonder to me. 

Happy Birthday Nathan!

Don't worry Emily, those teeth have been brushed thousands of times since the "poop" incident.

TEENAGE DREAM

Just because I am a grandmother doesn't mean I have to act like one so when a couple of friends suggested a get together I jumped at the chance.  I'd forgotten how much fun it is to have a couple of friends come stay overnight.  We talked about boys (our husbands), how to do our hair (one said she would prefer a brush cut, seriously?) while we painted our toenails. We took silly pictures withWoody, proof that my persuasion skills are as good as Matthew's but I had to promise that there would be no posting of said pictures on either facebook or my blog. Darn!  We played games and I made an amazing come from behind run to win the Last Word...it's my blog so I can totally brag it up if I want... and anyway a game where you have to try and get the last word in? you know I am going to rock that one unless perhaps I am playing with Daniel. 

So it was fun to be a teenager again even if it was just for a night.  Oh, I almost forgot *wink* dancing in the basement.  It wouldn't  be a sleepover without dancing and dance we did.  Someone...it may or may not have been me... hooked up a hidden camera to capture an unsuspecting hoofer.  No promises were made regarding the release of such a movie so enjoy.  Heads have been cut off to protect the identity of the victim.
The Movie

DAD LIFE

One last post on Father's Day.

Enjoy!

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY

I gave a talk at church today on the subject of fathers.  I asked William and Maia a few questions about their dad and grandpa to use in my talk.  Their answers were pretty entertaining.

What is a dad's most important job?
Maia (2): Giving huggles.
William (4): Sleeping.

What is the best thing daddy does?
William: Plays games with us.
Maia: Colours with us.

Describe your daddy.
William: He likes treats.
Maia: He likes chocolates.
Maia: He's nice.
William: He reads scriptures to us and asks silly questions and mummy says not to say them any more.

What does daddy do for work?
William: Make money.
Maia; He writes questions.   (perhaps the silly ones he asks at scripture time)

What is a grandpa's most important job?
Maia: Golfing with daddy.
William:  He looks after us.

What does Grandpa do best?
Both: Sing songs.  (Singing is not a talent Ian possesses so this one made me laugh out loud.)

Describe Grandpa.
William: He plays with us, he's nice,he gives us treats.
Maia: He gives us apple juice ( a treat as we usually just drink water), he comes to our house and gives us cards.

Happy Father's Day Matthew, Ian, and all you other great dads out there.

ROY

My father-in-law once told me that at his age nothing really embarrassed him anymore.  I took this as a
challenge and have spent the last number of years taking almost every opportunity I can to do just that.  I can make him disappear faster than ice cream at a kids birthday party  and it's pretty funny to watch.   I once pretended to be intellectually handicapped while standing in a checkout line of the Warehouse ( a chain store in New Zealand).  He was standing behind me in line and when I turned to see his reaction he was gone not just away from the line but right out the door of the store.  I don't think I could have even moved that fast.
"I know people in there." he complained to me later.   I laughed.
There was the time we had dinner at a fancy chinese restaurant and I did a very brutal imitation of a chinese accent as we were paying at the front, again he disappeared but maybe that was because he didn't want to pay.   He's put up with me putting grapes in his bed, locking him out of his hotel room with nothing but a towel wrapped around  his waist,  and warning him that the fly of his pants is down when it's not (he just can't help himself, he has to check) and yet he still makes me feel like I am his favourite daughter-in-law, and even though I give him no respect (he's frequently the butt of all my jokes)  I love him more than words can say.
Happy Father's Day Dad!   Thanks for being such a great sport.

FRIENDS?

Yes, I am back on the facebook thing again only this time it is about people who send a friend request when you don't even know them.  Who does that?  When I get a friend request like that my oddball radar goes off loud and clear and I hear echoes from the robot of Lost In Space "Danger Will Robinson DANGER!" only saying "Danger Fionna....well you get what I 'm talking about unless you're too young to remember that show and have never seen the reruns. Oh wait a minute, surely you saw the Lost in Space movie because as we all know that movie was a major blockbuster. No?  Anyhoo, I got a friend request from someone just recently who I didn't recognize so I checked friends we had in common and emailed one to ask about this person just out of curiosity.  In the email I accused the person of being weird because clearly they would have to be, right?   I then hoped that the person sending the request wasn't related to the person I had just emailed because that would be awkward.  It reminded me of the time we had a couple over for dinner and I told story after story of a complete whacko I know (they are the funniest stories ever but alas, I think the whacko reads my blog so they will remain unwritten).  I didn't mention any names even though there was little to no chance the couple would know her.  Daniel was listening in on the conversation and kept begging to know who it was.  I told him it didn't matter but he wouldn't let it go so I finally just told him who it was (I would never make a good spy for that very reason).  The wife  spoke up and told me that the whacko was her cousin.  At first I though she was joking but no she was not.  Not good but not as bad I think as when Daniel carried on for 20 minutes about how ugly fake brick is on a house as we drove his friend home only to arrive at her home and yes you guessed it, it was covered in fake brick.  I guess  foot in mouth disease is hereditary.

BLUSH MAGNET

This is why a friend suggested that I title my blog Blush Magnet.

Daniel sent this clip to me from the Australian version of the Today Show. Watch to the end. Funny, funny, funny.

UNFRIENDED

I was chatting with a friend the other day when she revealed to me that she had just recently been "unfriended" on facebook by a close family friend after a bit of drama between the two.  We laughed. I confessed that I too had been a victim of being unfriended three times in the past.  I am not talking about someone paring down their friend list by removing a person they don't know well but rather a purposeful removal of a name because they are mad at the person.

I am not quite sure what the desired result is when someone unfriends me but if they are hoping to hurt my feelings it has an entirely opposite effect.   It usually results in me calling a couple of friends to enjoy a good laugh together about it. I think it's hilarious because it's just so.... so.... juvenile I guess.  I get that the person doesn't want me knowing any of their business etc. but seriously if things are that bad between us, why would I even care to know their business?  Anyway I am a master facebook stalker, I could so totally find pictures, and updates of my unfriend if I wanted.  So if you get mad at me, go ahead and unfriend me, I either won't even notice or I'll have a good laugh.  Either way, I win.

A HILL, A HEEL, AND A SKIRT

This past week our lovely daughter-in-law Emily graduated from Sheridan Tech with a degree in advertising.  Unfortunately she was only allowed two guests for the graduation ceremony so we weren't able to attend, apparently Ian and I aren't the two most important people in her life, what's with that?  All joking aside, we are proud of her and her accomplishment.  Congratulations Emily! By the way, isn't that a great picture of Emily and her little niece Ava?

Though I wasn't able to go to Emily's graduation, I was able to attend the graduation of another young woman.  I have to say it was the highlight of my week and not for the reasons you might think.  The ceremony was long but the speakers were great so the time passed fairly quickly.  The fun began after the ceremony when we went outside to take pictures.  Cora stood atop a small hill while I took her picture and then she called for her mom to pose with her for a few photos.  Her mom bent down to put her bottle of water and her purse on the ground.  This is when the heel of her shoe got caught in her skirt.  When she stood back up her elastic waisted skirt slipped down at the back exposing her underwear.  As she tried to pull her skirt back up the heel of her shoe stuck fast and up went her foot knocking her off balance and down she went head over heels down the hill underwear even more exposed.  Fortunately (?) there were a lot of people around and a few kindhearted souls rushed to her rescue because Cora and I were laughing so hard we could barely move.  I did manage to take a few pictures because that's the kind of caring friend I am.  I truly am surprised that I am not the most absolutely popular person I know.

"I suppose you're going to call and tell everybody about this." she said to me as I dropped her off at home.
"No" I replied "I'm going to blog about it."
I quickly rolled the window up so I couldn't hear her reply.

Congratulations Cora!

BIRTHDAY BOY

My biggest fear for Matthew when he was young was that he would grow up to bilk little old ladies out of their life savings.  That boy had charm and knew how to use it, he could sell sand to a nomad.   His powers of persuasion have gotten me into a trouble on more than one occasion.   I remember him telling me to watch as he convinced a lady to break her own rule of not making any changes to a billeting list at a youth conference so that he could stay at the same place as his friends.  I had already seen a number of youth  try the same ploy to no avail. It took Matthew all of five minutes to accomplish his mission.  At high school he often talked teachers into giving  him a higher mark than was originally granted him.  The boy had some serious skills.  

My fears of him bilking old ladies were unfounded (as they usually are, must be a mother thing) and he has turned into an amazing young man who honours his wife, adores his children, and is quick to help others.  He has an amazing sense of humour and even though he no longer tries to get me to laugh at inappropriate times (I miss that) he still likes to make me laugh.   I couldn't be prouder of him.

Happy Birthday Matthew!

TRUE STORY

My brother-in-law was just telling me about his neighbor across the street and the run in he had with a would be intruder the other week.

The neighbor (a former Navy Seal) and his wife were sleeping one night and the wife woke up to the sound of someone trying to break into the house.  She woke her husband who immediately jumped out of bed and grabbed his shotgun.  He quickly ran down the stairs, out the side door and around the corner to discover that indeed there was somebody trying to pry open the patio door (stupid).  He put his gun to the back of the head of the would be intruder and told him to get down on the ground.  The burglar immediately complied (smart) and the homeowner placed his foot on the intruder's back and yelled at his wife to call the police.  The police quickly arrived and took the would be burglar into custody.  The homeowner stood chatting to the police giving an official statement for their records when his wife came out to join him.  "Dear" she said "you may want to go inside and put something on."
In all the excitement he had failed to realize that he wasn't wearing a stitch of clothing.
True story.

RHYME TIME

Another Jeopardy category for you.

A. The congressman recently caught with his pants down was showing off this.

Q. What is Weiner's wiener?

This is a picture of a congressman from New York whose last name is Weiner. Last week someone supposedly hacked his twitter account and sent a picture of a wiener (not the hot dog but the male anatomy kind) to a young female follower.

Check out the video here.  In the interview he will not say with certitude if the wiener is in fact his nor will he divulge why he did not involve the FBI in the matter.  Perhaps it is because the FBI are too busy looking into the terrorist cell hacking my blog for their nefarious purposes.